Testimonies

  

The most difficult challenge with growing up is in figuring how much one can explore, experiment and in young person’s parlance have fun. This is the root cause of all of teenage conflicts with authority especially one’s parents. They are killjoy parents, isn't it?    

I remember bringing my first girlfriend home. I mean, she wasn't my first girlfriend but she was the first I brought home and that should count for something, shouldn't it? When a boy man-up to bring his girlfriend home it really should count for maturity, I felt.

I was barely 18, but had seen many foreign movies. My mother hadn’t, or do not care what goes on with 18 years olds elsewhere. So she would not give us any privacy. And there in the room were “we”; boyfriend, girlfriend and boyfriend’s mother. No other three could be more of a crowd. It was awkward!

I have had to calm my nerves bringing my Juliet home, and here was mom making it look bad. And who wants to look bad at all, more so with their girlfriend present?

So I was taking fault, and hating. I hated having no me-space, no privacy, but also that my mom does not trust me.

I have come to learn that boundaries are necessary, and that the earliest ones set by our parents are part of life and God’s process.

I will close with an Igbo proverb. “The patient child will eat the bearded meat.”

Hurrying doesn’t make it sweeter, waiting takes nothing away from it.

Young persons must appreciate and enjoy the process.

Written by Ojogbon Tobi Ayanwole